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If King Kong could only speak ...
Sep 03, 2005

- If King Kong could speak, he might say this: “Movies bad. Downloading good.”

Time: Saturday night. 7:00 PM

Place: Anytown, USA – or just Anywhere in the World

Girl: Let's go to the movies tonight.

Boy: Nah, there's nothing playing. Just a lot of over-hyped and over-priced garbage. Anyway, it costs too much, you’re not allowed to bring in your own snacks, the theatres are too small, filthy and noisy, and the seats are uncomfortable. It’s not worth it.”

Girl: OK. Then let's rent a DVD.

Boy: Nah. Blockbluster only has rows and rows of last year’s bombs and remakes. No more classics. No independent films, either.

Girl: Hmm. Then let's see what we can find on the net for free. You start surfing now, I'll get the popcorn made, and we'll have a nice, relaxing, inexpensive night in.

Boy: Cool : )

Recognize anyone? So do the studios.

The above scene is no doubt played out every week in homes everywhere around the world. And the movie studios know it.

The reason? Their movies SUCK! This is according to a new survey from Brandimensions, reported by CNN.

Brandimensions searched almost 2 million blogs and chat rooms using relevancy algorithms to choose 1,350 posts to “dissect by using software coupled with human data analysts.” (Whoa!) Their findings are no surprise to us, but must have put the wind up more than a few MPAA suits.

The poor quality of movies is the number one reason for people not going to the theatre as often as they used to. Other top factors included the rising costs of movie tickets, onscreen commercials shown before films and even inadequate parking. Of those who cited cost and inconvenience as their top reasons, they also said they would put up with it if the movies and “stars” were appealing.

More and more people are weighing the cost of going out to the flicks and the quality of “product” being offered, against renting something they know they’ll enjoy from services such as Netflix, without the hassle or expense of having to leave home. And with home cinema systems coming down in price, even cheap no-name dvd players and “surround sound” systems are now affordable for many families.

And still others (according to my own observation of message boards) are turning to free filesharing networks for the ease of picking and choosing what they want, when and where they want it, and in which format they prefer. No-one is paying money for downloading videos and music, and no-one is demanding money. No-one is making any money from it. No-one is losing any money from it.

Renting or buying a DVD used to be something to look forward to, but to many involved in the survey, a short time between theatrical and DVD release still means the film was a bomb, no matter how much the studios’ marketing experts hype it. For the most part, that hasn’t changed. Even George Lucas knows this, changing the DVD release date of the last “Star Wars” dud from mid-September to mid-November. He’s not fooling anyone. Pushing back the release date doesn’t make the film better.

But the studio suits still insist that filesharing is killing the industry. They refuse to realise the world has changed, that consumers’ desires have shifted, and that they’re slitting their own throats when they make false accusation like that, equating a downloaded film to a lost sale. They claim the reason that profits and ticket sales are down (the industry earned $84 billion last year!) is due to filesharing, or as they inaccurately label it, “piracy”.

Absolutely no piracy is involved in filesharing.

Just ask “The Commitments”, one of the most popular independent bands in the world. I did.

And while you’re at it, ask writer/producer/director Nat Segaloff what he thinks about filesharing and piracy. Segaloff is a former journalist, studio publicist, teacher, TV producer, entertainment editor, and the author of ten books. He also wrote and directed the short (1min 55sec), independent film “Steal This Disc” (short movie download here), which clearly illustrates the evil, hypocritical, thieving, out-moded business practices of the MPAA which hold back technological innovation as well as independent creativity. As the film’s synopsis states, “Sure, video piracy is a no-no, but there's also something kharmic (sic) about it. Ask anybody who's ever taken monkey points.” (Monkey points?)

We agree that piracy is a no-no. “Piracy”, as in bootleg sales of CD’s and DVD’s. “Piracy”, as in large, world-wide, criminal organisations which pump out thousands of bootlegs per day and earn millions – or is it billions? – every year on street corners, at flea markets, and even e-Bay. “Piracy”, as in studios which regularly steal royalties and copyrighted works from their owners. That’s piracy. That’s theft.

But that’s not what filesharing is about. It’s about sharing information and entertainment. It’s about forming community bonds. It’s about freedom of choice and freedom to do what one wants with legally purchased “product”.

Peter Jackson, director of the insanely expensive and hugely mediocre “Lord of the Rings” trilogy (readying yet another unwanted, over-hyped, over-budgeted remake of “King Kong”, for a Christmas ’05 release) and current MPAA mouthpiece says, "Piracy has the very real potential of tipping movies into becoming an unprofitable industry, especially big-event films. If that happens, they will stop being made."

No, that’s not going to happen. But perhaps he shouldn’t demand a $20 million dollar salary (plus royalties) for each film? Wouldn’t that save money?

He goes on. "No studio is going to finance a film if the point is reached where their possible profit margin goes straight into criminals' pockets."

No, Mr. Jackson. Incorrect again. Perhaps the studios will realise that threatening and terrorizing innocent people doesn’t work and they’ll invest their money in new 21st century business and distribution models (instead of bogus court proceedings), which will in turn free up a lot of money to invest in high quality films with top-notch performers. Perhaps they’ll clean house and bring in new writers and directors with original ideas and creative vision who won’t demand outrageous salaries, which will keep budgets down and profits up.

Maybe then each and every actor, musician, and technician will receive their fair share of rightly-earned royalties with each and every sale, rental, and ticket purchase.

And perhaps then the studios might not stiff you on your own “oh-so-precious” merchandise royalties.

Studios, WAKE UP! You’re committing suicide by design when you refuse to listen to what your employers (the consumers) want. You use devious business and accounting practices, cheat and steal from copyright owners, and destroy the industry you claim to protect by suing innocent people around the world for something they have the legal and moral right to do.

If you worked for my company, I’d sack your collective asses on the spot and hire honest, competent people who can do the job.

catflap

tags:  king  kong  speak 
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